Etsy sellers fabricate impossible ages for contemporary products, pretending they are 20+ year old vintage. Watch the pants catch fire and burn. #etsysellsvintage

I dunno if a picture is worth a thousand words, as the saying goes.

But these hilarious Etsy listings for products pretending to be "vintage" (at least 20 years old) prove that a picture can disclose the dishonesty of a seller.

I found these items while I was browsing through the "vintage" items at the Vintage link in the upper right corner of Etsy's pages.  Items are displayed in order of relevancy, so out of 10 million or so listings the sellers claim are "vintage" the 12,000 items shown at the link are what Etsy corporate wants shoppers to see.

LythaStudios sells supplies for making jewelry, but it seems that the shop owner is one of those Etsygirls who can't resist seizing a Tag-o-rama Moment.  (Tag-o-rama was a suggestion made by Etsy's management and staff that sellers should list their items in categories other than those that are the best, common sense, match for them.)  LythaStudios rammed her Kumi Loom Kumihimo disk into Vintageville even though it's a perfect fit for Crafting Supplies and Tools.  Dated by this mendacious seller as "Vintage from before 2000", the smell of combusting pants (on fire) becomes unmistakable as soon as you view the main photo:  the item has a date stamped right on it, and it says 2008!  UPDATE JUNE29:  the mendacious LythaStudios has revised the item, stating NOW that it is simply "vintage", which it will be according to Etsy's 20+ year old standard in 2028.  Why do Etsygirls get so obsessed with lying?  This item is clearly a tool for crafting, and would be listed by an honest seller as a (non vintage) Supply.  3 units in stock.

How would you like one of Etsy's "vintage" sellers to create a custom item for you, traveling back in time 20 years after she receives your order?  That's what FiregypsyVintage is selling in her listing for an embroidered patch with up to 17 custom characters -- and it's listed as "Vintage from before 2000".  Only in the Etsyverse can you order an item to be created for you in the future that is already 20 years old.  Except, of course, it's not vintage.  It's brand new.

Etsy has done it again:  on June 20 a handmade to order listing was featured as "vintage" as part of the "throwback Thursday" promotional email.  Just to remind you, Etsy shop owners can list anything handmade as "vintage" as part of the site's "tag-o-rama" concept of categorizing items in irrelevant ways to make them visible to more shoppers.  And doing this with Vintage has two additional benefits from corporate's point-of-view:  1) it increases the count of items listed AS vintage without adding additional authentic Vintage items to the site and 2) it discourages shoppers knowledgeable about authentic Vintage from shopping on Etsy (see too many fakes, and you click away) which, in turn, encourages Vintage sellers with declining sales to close up shop and leave.  Win, win.


The email, titled "Vintage summer staples" included these silver earrings with turquoise and blue topaz which the mendacious sack of a seller JanPalomboDesign listed as both "vintage from before 2000" and "handmade".  The seller's Description clearly states "Handmade to order", but the listing says there are 16 pairs of the earrings in stock.  There are so many contradiction here that Etsy's promotional curators found the listing impossible to resist!

Currently the link to the online version of the June 20, 2019 email has been disabled, and half of the images originally visible in the email version are gone.  If the link becomes available again, I'll post it here.

Etsy Discover Vintage continues to feature brand new items -- Vintage Seller Community remains silent #etsysellsvintage

Thought it would be fun to take a look at another grouping of 36 linked listings featured today in Etsy's Discover Vintage  Note that you may see a different group of 36 thumbnails if you click on that link.  This post is about the items which were shown to me.

Let's see how many items of the 36 are actually 20+ year old Vintage, and take a look at the items which are actually new.

Beginning in the upper left corner, the first item is a handmade wedding invitation test set that is tagged "vintage" for some reason unknown -- maybe because wedding invitations have been around for 20+ years?

Item number 2 is a vintage bracelet.

Item number 3 is a handmade peacock feather ring that the seller claims is "one of a kind" -- with 45 units in stock.  Tagged and titled with the keyword "vintage".

Item number 4 is a vintage wall lamp.

Item number 5 is a handmade made to order custom address stamp   Tagged and titled with the keyword "vintage" because the fonts used are Art Deco inspired.

Item number 6 is a set of vintage wine glasses.

Item number 7 is a pair of Miao tribal earrings that are listed as a "vintage item" but are widely available all over the web NEW.  Were recently sold here on AliExpress  The seller states in the item's Description that a portion of their sales are donated to "women's craft collectives" in developing nations -- this item is part of the Pier Etsy Platform were sellers purchase new craft items and resell them on Etsy as "vintage".

Item number 8 is a vintage sweatshirt.

Item number 9 is a handmade ring with a turquoise colored glass stone  It is titled and tagged "vintage" -- the seller used vintage glass cabs/stones as a material.

Item number 10 is a handmade to order girls cotton dress  Tagged with "vintage" for reasons unknown.

Item number 11 is a digital download of a sweater pattern  which is listed as a "vintage supply from the 1980s" -- which it is not because only physical items have age.  The seller does not specify the date of the pattern, and it may not be in the public domain.  Note that Etsy allows any digital file to be listed as "vintage" provided the content is "vintage", which is not what authentic vintage means or is.

Item number 12 is a handmade to order womens halter top  with 96 units in stock.  (As you can see, the Etsyverse has not only redefined words like "handmade" "vintage" "unique" but "made to order" as well.  Sizes XS and XL are shown as sold out!  Tagged "vintage" because tops like these have been around for decades.  Anything and everything on Etsy eventually will be tagged as "vintage".

Item number 13 is a handmade wedding song request printable PDF file  Titled and tagged with "vintage" because the card is illustrated with a vintage cassette tape.

Item number 14 is a pair of handmade lever back earrings offered in 20 colors  And they are tagged "vintage".

Item number 15 is a pair of 1980s clip on earrings, a vintage item!

Item number 16 is a set of vintage decaled glass tumblers.

Item number 17 is a handmade womens tee shirt vintage inspired  Mendaciously tagged "vintage", "vintage tshirt", "70s", "70s t shirt" and "70s tee" along with "vintage inspired".  How can a brand new handmade item be dated to the 1970s?  Tag-o-rama, baby!

Item number 18 is  handmade to order floral wallpaper  Tagged and titled with the keyword "vintage".

Item number 19 is an 1880s vintage ring.

Item number 20 is a vintage vinyl record album.

Item number 21 is a handmade to order 2019 wedding invitation package  Tagged as "vintage" for no known reason.

Item number 22 is a set of mid 20th Century Dutch ceramic vases.

Item number 23 is a vintage scarf.

Item number 24 is a handmade altered denim jacket with hand painted flowers  It's a vintage denim jacket, but listed as handmade, which is spot on.  Because the seller tagged it with "vintage", it got snagged as 20+ years old.

Item number 25 is a vintage deer's tooth ring.

Item number 26 is a vintage dried flowers under glass sun catcher.

Item number 27 is a handmade to order amethyst ring  tagged and titled with "vintage" for no known reason.

Item 28 is a vintage brooch.

Item 29 is a handmade case for iPhone/Plus case for 6, 7 and 8  iPhone is 11 years old this year, but this item is tagged "vintage" because, on Etsy, any item can be "vintage".

Item 30 is a vintage skirt.

Item 31 is a handmade black dress which is tagged "vintage" and "1950s".

Item number 32 is a handmade to order couple illustration printable wedding invitation  Tagged as "vintage" -- because everyone is doing it?

Item number 33 is a handmade to order denim pant and crop top set  Tagged "70s" and "vintage", even though tops like this were not paired with high waisted jeans or pants back in the day.  What the photo shows is a 1960s top and a  maybe 1990s pant.

Item number 34 is a handmade to order burlap garland  The seller put "vintage" in her title and tags, even though the item is clearly contemporary.

Item number 35 is a handmade floral embellished hair comb  Tagged with "vintage".

Item number 36 is a handmade paracord macrame plant hanger   Tagged "vintage".

And there it is:  out of 36 items featured under the link Discover Vintage, only 14 items are actually vintage.  One item is listed as vintage, but it's a digital download.  Another item is listed as vintage, but it's a Pier Etsy Craft Product from a developing nation.  The remaining 20 items are all new handmade, or not yet made to order.

I used to be an antiques dealer, and if a dealer found themselves in an antiques shop with stuff like this for sale, there would be a disdainful comment about "crafts" and a speedy exit from the premises.  But that's how #etsysellsvintage, right, girls?